'Yes and No'

Today’s blog is about what I think are the 3 most important words in martial arts. They are:

Yes and No.

Before I go any further, I’ll just take a moment for a brief aside. If you bought Guru Eddie’s

brilliant Approach instructional offering, you might well be thinking that the 3 most

important words in martial arts are Headbutts and Hammers. However, as I hope you’ll

appreciate by the end of this brief piece, even headbutts and hammers need Yes and No if

they are to function appropriately.

Right, back to it…

Here are some ways in which Yes and No are so important:

First of all, they are integral to the discipline we need as martial artists. We need the

discipline to train when we don’t feel like it – in other words, a Yes, I will attitude - coupled

with the discipline not to train when our body and/or mind are giving us clear signals that we

should rest – a No, I won’t attitude. This example reflects the fact that it’s essential that we

manage Yes and No appropriately in all aspects of our life. Quite simply, we have to be clear when to say Yes and when to say No and have the discipline and willpower to act

accordingly.

For example:

We need the courage to confront fear – a Yes, I will attitude - and the courage and wisdom to avoid rising to an inappropriate bait – a No, I won’t attitude.

We need the willingness to accept responsibility - Yes, I will - and the humility to avoid

showing off - No, I won’t.

We need the honesty to take ownership of our mistakes - Yes, I did - and to acknowledge our limitations - No, I don’t know, or No I don’t have that ability.

However, I began by saying that this article was about the 3 most important words in martial

arts (although they might also be the most important in the rest of our life, too), and so far,

I’ve focussed on only 2 words: Yes and No. So now, I’m going to highlight the power of the

word in the middle – and – especially when it combines with the word that precedes it.

Yes and is arguably the most powerful phrase in the English language. Yes and reflects a can- do attitude that is, in turn, based on an accurate understanding of the situation we are in.

Yes and relates to all aspects of the OODA Loop, the process of Observe-Orientate-Decide-

Act that summarises the acute awareness that precedes appropriate action.

We can’t have a Yes and attitude if, for example, we are in denial about the reality of what is

going on, or if we fail to identify an important aspect of the situation we are analysing.

Neither can we respond appropriately to useful feedback from others – or from ourselves -

without the willingness that comes from a Yes and attitude.

Actually, we can’t say or act out a very definite No! without having first applied a Yes and

approach to the situation we are in. (For example, we might realise from the behaviour of a

stranger that they are intending to rob us. Only when we have acknowledged that and

accepted it – Yes, this is the situation I’m in, and he is going to attack me – can we shift state into the necessary, No you won’t!)

Yes and can also help us with the physical expression of our art. In Silat Fitrah we have a Yes and attitude every time we strike, throw, trip etc. This not only helps to ensure that our head is moving in the direction of our strike, the sense of Yes! also encourages a slight nodding movement as we do so (we nod, often subconsciously, when we say Yes); both help to add the weight of our head into our blow.

In short, Yes and No are the yin and yang of our language and our life. They are two parts of

the same circle, and we only ever complete that circle when we manage both well.